seperti biasa kan, menjelang ambang tahun baru nie, i nak flash back on what 2013 has bring me ...2012 has been a really tough year for me professionally ...but 2013 was much better ..i started off with a bang - celebrated the first day of 2013 with my family ...coz my uncle buat party besar2an masa tu to celebrate his son's engagement ..and I get to usher 2013 with my parents and surrounded my relatives and close families ...then a few weeks later, I had a fun 24 hours with my best buddies - hahaha a part of my farewell - kira last ronggeng le ...sessi karoks, makan makan ...and lepak2 sembang2 ...was a great fun guys!
and the end of Jan marked a new chapter in my life - both professionally and personally ...29th Jan I flew to NZ to start a life as PhD student ...in a land where I do not know anyone ...and a country that I have not set foot into before ..it was very hard especially since I have to be away from the two boys ...memang banjir ajer lah Welly and Kuching ...hahaha gaya tu macam tak pernah dok overseas ... memang lah benar orang kata, life begins when you leave your comfort zone ...i came here tanpa kenal sesapa, but I was lucky enough to meet a few people who are very nice and kind enough to introduce me to their friends and friends of friends ...by mid Feb, aku mula dapat invites for party every weekend ..memang tak disangka ..hahaha but that's how i know many nice, friendly people here ...and most of them have become my firm friends ...
i found that i have different groups of friends - kekawan from Maryam's circle - selalu meet them for yoga, coffee, potlucks, movies and just hanging out ...and kekawan from my school - selalu for coffees, talks, discussions, potlucks and dancing parties, and then I have the girls - anita and the gang: I met Kak Shidah, Anita, Sue and Ms .S ..tak tau macam mana kami jumpa but we clicked straight away and become very close ...things happened - as they do, and i know these are the people I can count on masa aku susah ...and masa senang memang we all have fun together ...Kak shidah took me in - bawak makan2 jalan2 lepak2 ....and it helped me to adapt to life in Welly ...selalu weekend ajer mmg akan ada activity dengan dia and anita ...now I am missing both of them!
besides new friends, persahabatan yang terjalin with old friends masih dikekalkan ..my Yetis came over for a quick visit after Raya ...and walaupun singkat, we had a blast exploring Wellington! Am sure Kiky and Tijot will remembered how I dragged them walking on foot to explore Welly hahaha windy and hilly Welly :-)
another peristiwa yang tak dapat dilupakan this year was the earthquake ...my first ever earthquake experience ..and it is some scary shit I tell you! Welly was hit by a quake yang besar in July ..but masa tu takde effect kat aku coz I was taking a month off balik Malaysia ..ingatkan dah ok leh kan ..but in August, another big one hit Welly ...this time aku memang ada kat sini ...i remembered that day well ..just finished my supervision meeting ..and alone in my office ..tetiba gegeran berlaku ..it just felt like you are being swayed from side to side ....and it was long!!! biasa kejap ajer ..this one was on and on and on for like 30-40 seconds ...and then hundreds of aftershocks ...scary ..memang aku ingat rumah le masa tu ..Malaysia ku yang tercinta ...biasa panas sampai ke tulang tapi stabil takde gegaran! alhamdulillah things are ok ..rumah aku selamat ...opis aku pun ok ..and aku pun ok ..kira ok le kan ...but, memang scary ...
ooo and the night of my birthday, ada gak smallquake lol ...sangat memorable birthday aku pada 2013 lol i had a few surprises on my birthday ..dr m and gang send a vid of them singing Happy birthday to me - so touched! then had two bday celebration - one with the girls - siap ngan surprise cake - and the other with Nabil and the gang ...sangat2 terharu ...almaklum a big 40 this year kan ...
but not all are fun and glorious ...cabaran utama aku adalah dok rumah share nie ...yarabi, at times kesabaran amat teruji ....tapi dah lumrah kan ..dapat lak minah pemalas ...and jenis tak suka mengemas ..aiyooo pening akak ...sampai fikir nak pindah keluar ...but when push comes to shove, aku fikir2 balik, rumah nie paling sesuai - dekat and affordable for me ...rumah yang aku plan nak pindah tu cantik ...atas bukit, with a view of the ocean and Miramar peninsular ...but jauh ...and aku tak sanggup le ...so stay put here for 2014 ...rumah nie 5 min ajer from my opis :-)
and cakap pasal opis ...that is actually my second home for 2013 ...masa mula2 masuk, i hated my office and i dont really like my officemates ..I came in as the fourth person in that small room ..small compared to my own opis kat uni aku dulu ....dulu aku takyah share share kan ..so cam tak best le nak share share ..and those three memang tak welcoming pada mula nya ..charlie - aku sempat jumpa 2-3 kali ajer ...coz masa aku masuk, dia baru sbumit thesis - so selalu takde kat opis ..and left NZ sebulan pas aku masuk .. Mike and Ped cam toya ajer hahaha rupanya masa aku masuk tu dorang both had deadlines - so memang takde masa sembang ...but after two weeks both are ok ...last month aku uglit balik kat Mike how I hated to be the unwanted fourth in the room ..and when charlie left aku jadi the dreaded third ..he was laughing and said he was glad i masuk opis tu ..and no, i was not the dreaded fourth but most definitely a terrific third ..hahaha and when he left (dia grad dah) he gave me his workspace ...the one with a view of the harbour!
Now opis ni lah my sanctuary ...i spent most of my waking hours here ..and kerja pun start banyak ...but so far so good...my sv said i am on track, so that's good news ...one thing I learned this year - you got to love what you do! I am at work - sebab I love what I do ...and it was my choice to do a PhD... at times, sangat mencabar minda ...tipulah kalau aku kata aku tak stress, tak nangis ...but at the end of the day, when I think about it - the answer is the same, i choose to be here ...i choose to do this course ..and it is up to me to get it done ..and while I am at it, might as well enjoy the process kan ..afterall, happiness is a choice ..I choose to be happy ...happy people get more work done :-)
the reason I said that was, despite a good year I was shattered by a bad news a few weeks back ..i am so down that i was not able to work padahal dalam saat critical as my proposal dateline was looming ..the situation is out of my control ..but I have friends who help me see sense ...he said, things are thrown at us from many directions, how we handle them will show how we are coping ..we can cope by crying - but it may not solve anything ...we can cope by ignoring the problem or running away, and that will solve nothing ..or confront it heads on ..but with clear, rational thoughts about how to solve a problem ...i did that ..i followed that advice ...and i hope to settle this once a for all ...i now realised I have been running away ..i have tried to ignored how i feel ..i feed the hatred inside me for so long ...without realising that by running away, I am still very much "broken" inside out ...i have made a resolution - if and when I have a problem, running away will not be part of my option...happiness is a choice ...and I make my own happiness ...
tu dia, panjang kisah suka duka aku for 2013...apa apa pun, am wishing for a better 2014 for all of us ..for better life - yang sentiasa diberkati, and most of all, i am wishing all of us success in whatever we do! Thank you for all your support all this while - you know who you are -
arohanui and Happy New Year 2014
much love from me